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It is a common belief that the decline of fatherhood is one of the most basic, unexpected, and extraordinary social trends of our time. A shadow of a father on his son is as important as a pen is to a writer. Some fathering advocates say that almost every social ill faced by Americas children is related to fatherlessness (Kimir B1). There are very few people saying that they doubt the fundamental importance of mothers, yet there are those that believe that the importance of a father figure is diminishing. There are even those who see the father position in a family to be easily replaceable with another figure such as a stepfather, aunt, uncle, grandparent, or any other person
Fathers play their role from the point their children born. Every time a child cries or even needs help the father is always there. He gives the family financial, social and mental support that it needs. He will help the child up until he or she can get up on their own legs and start making a living without them.
Children undergo many situations when they are not surrounded by their parents. Sometimes when it comes to make decisions they do not have anyone to look upon which may cause them to make wrong or negative decisions (Absence of Father). For instance, parental divorce and father loss has been associated with difficulties in school adjustment, social adjustment, and personal adjustment. Children living without a father usually face poverty before they enter their teen years and they lack education. These children at an older age either become a target of drug abuse or crime (Absence of Father). Fathering cannot be ignored because fathers play an important role in helping their children grow.
"Americans have fallen into the practice of leaving the children to themselves and hoping they wont turn out too badly" (Morrow ). People do not understand the effects that a child could have if they are not surrounded by a father. Leaving the kids all up to their selves may cause lack in common sense. A childs mental growth occurs between the age of to 5 (Absence of Father). If they are not taken care of during this period it may cause less growth then the kid who did have a fathers support at an earlier age.
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Fathers also play a role in to the childs relationship with others and also the way they act. Fathers are significant to both boys and girls. For instance, boys can learn from their fathers about growing up as a male, male interests, activities, and social behavior.It is equally important that when a father advises and guides his son, the word is not darkened with criticism and judgments. The father must be mindful of not projecting his own issues or depression onto his son; because the boy will accept everything his father says as unfailing truth. Boys crave approval and unconditional love from their dads, as well as guidance and respect. Without it they flounder like an unmoored boat, smashing against the rocks. Girls can also learn from their fathers to develop a trusting comfortable relationship with men. No matter how bad or unattending a father is to his son and daughter, the children will always seek their fathers approval. A fathers approval is critical to a childs development. A son feels as though he is adrift without the support and consent of his dad. For this reason, it is vital to our culture that kids have the attention and time of their fathers.
Also fatherless family children face many situations which causes them to take dangerous steps in their life. The data collections on the internet show that "Children from a fatherless home are 5 times more likely to commit suicide, times more likely to run away, 0 times more likely to have behavioral disorders, and so on " (Chen). The impact of a father on the children at the early age helps them to develop their social and mental skills.
The impact of parental divorce and subsequent father absence in the family has long been thought of to affect children quite negatively. Being without a feather also causes many economic problems in the family. In almost all the houses the main income of money is the father. In 16, young children living with unmarried mothers were five times as likely to be poor and ten times as likely to be extremely poor (Absence of Father ). Almost 75% of American children living in single-parent families will experience poverty before they turn 11 years old. Only 0 percent of children in two-parent families will do the same (Absence of Father ). This lack of money causes kids to drop out from school at an age of 16 to 18 (Absence of Father). After dropping out from school the student gets greedy for money and works full time rather than getting his/her education. At the later age this may result in not making enough money to feed the family of their own.
This lack of money problem will not be easily solved in families like these. And if these problems continue it might cause the family to go in debt. This debt may end up the whole family on the streets. The study shows that almost 8 percent of the families living on the streets lack a father (Kimir B1 ). Looking at the examples above father in most of the American houses is the financial base of the family.
One of the worst effects that children undergo is the lack of knowledge in field of crime and drugs due to the absence of a father. If there was no father in the house the child will for the most part will be a target of drugs and alcohol. "A child without a father has no sense at all of what to do first time someone offers them drugs" (Absence of father). Kids are most likely to be a target if their parents do not know who their childs friends are.
Lack of money in the family causes the child to use inappropriate ways to make money. Due to this condition the children would become criminals or thieves because they are in desperate need of money. Also in need of money they will, for the most part, commit crimes such as robberies. In some families girls need to run the whole house on their financial status. Since they would not be making enough money they might also choose a wrong way to make money. The girls when they get older, in most cases, will become prostitutes (Absence of Father). And if they are caught doing these kind of crimes they will end up in jail. So, lack of father in a family might cause their children to join gangs, commit crimes, and be addicted to drugs.
"Since I am a male and am in the position of being a potential father, it only makes sense that I see the position of the father as an instrumental one pertaining to the upbringing of a child" (Chen). I am constantly surrounded by those who are in a family where either their parents are divorced and remarried, or those who live in single-parent household. I am biased on the issue of why a father figure is necessary due to the fact that I was raised, and am still being raised in a household where my parents remain married. I couldnt possibly imagine being raised in a family that is "broken" because Ive never experienced that situation. Therefore I find it a necessary that there be a father presence in the lives of their children.
Fathering should not be ignored under any circumstances. Fathering plays a critical role in the growth of the child and is responsible for their actions. Fatherlessness is very critical because it has many negative effects. Decision making skills of children rely on the proper fathering given to the children. Also lack of financial support from father may cause the children to drop out from the school or may be even lead them to use of drugs and be a criminal. I believe that having a fathers shadow on a child in their critical years may change their life for ever.
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