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Living together before marriage increased by 45% between 170 and 10. In recent years, approximately 60 % of people getting married have lived together . But only about 5 % of people living together end up getting married. Therefore at least some people learn things about relationship that helps them avoid bad relationship.
Testing the relationship before tying the knot really ensure a better marriage in the long run. Now, Id like to concentrate on advantages of cohabitation.
Living together before marriage is a good way for people to find out whether they would be compatible marriage partners. Knowing the partner is not the same as living with him or her. Dating just from time to time, partners are on their best behaviour, they avoid confrontation because they are eager to have someone love them and insecure in the temporary relationship. Moreover, this super nice behaviour may partly account for the radical changes in behaviour, personality and attitudes (almost always for worse) that sometimes occurs shortly after marriage.
Shacking up with somebody is a total different experience. People can get the full picture about who they are. If both partners are not ready yet for marriage but want a steady partner, living together offers obvious advantages. It can be real life learning experience of loving and adjusting on equal terms with another person. It is just one of many possible "tests" for a potential partner. The best predictor of good marriage is a long, relatively smooth relationship, in which wide variety of problems and successes are experienced. Living together measures the couples strengths and weaknesses in such areas as; communication, personality, expectations, leisure activities, conflict resolutions, financial management, parenting etc… Cohabitation provides a great opportunity for couples to get to know each other better, learn communication, decision-making, prepare for marriage and prevent future problems.
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Living together helps people distinguish between being "in love" and being in a good relationship. We have to remember that love brings out the best and something worse as well. Cohabitating partners learned that though they love each other very much, there are times when they cant stand each other. The key to any relationship is compromise and communication.
Living together is the only way to get to know the other person. It is important to know how the other person handles their finances, how they deal with crisis, how messy are they? You truly cannot get a really feel for that unless you are with that person for longer than a date or weekend together.
In addition, living together give partners the full picture of the person they live with. Give the picture of many possible future situations such as educational and career plans of both, having and caring for children by both, family relationship, religious matter, life-style, social lives, division of labour etc…
Many of media reports about study exaggerate the link between cohabitation and divorce. The study found a small differences (%) in the rate of divorce. But actually the reports did not draw the conclusion that living together before marriage was the cause of the relationship ending. According to sociologist William Moster it may not be the experience of cohabiting but the people who live together before marriage have different values than couples who do not.
Maybe more people living together before marriage would reduce the divorce rate. Cohabitation is much more accepted by this generation. I believe that our education generation is trying not to make the mistakes of previous generations of marrying someone they hardly know.
Anyway we have to remember that any relationships are up to a little bit of luck, lots efforts, individual circumstances and compatibility.
In conclusion Id like to say
A RELATIONSHIP IS LIKE A DANCE; TO STAY CLOSE WITHOUT STEPPING ON EACH OTHERS TOES TAKES PRACTICE.
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